Poems for my Brown Sister 1.5

Please view my preface of this collection of poems before reading this post.

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To My Sister, 1.5

When I see you, my feelings are of

Pride, Love, Joy

because the strength and beauty and life that you exude is beyond measure.

But I also have a feeling of shame when I look at you because I see history.

I see and feel what my people did to yours.

I see the pain you have felt so young because you were called derogatory names when you were just 10 at school – a “safe place.”

I see the eyes and soul of your great grandmother – who we were named after, a pure honor – who endured the disgusting yolk slavery my people placed upon her.

When I look at you, I feel fear.

Fear that causes me to hug you tighter each time you leave home, fear where I wonder what could happen — fear because I’ve seen recently what this world is capable of, still, after all this time, or even in the first place.

Pride, Love, Joy, Shame, Fear.

Pure Ambivalence.

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